Letting go of what we can’t change.

Radical acceptance is something I often discuss with my clients because it’s a concept that many people find challenging—and understandably so. Accepting something fully means letting go of any hope or wish that reality could be different. This isn’t easy; in fact, it might be one of the hardest things we ever do. I’ve struggled with this myself.

When we resist reality, we refuse to acknowledge painful emotions, events, or facts. This resistance can leave us feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or even disconnected from ourselves. It’s like swimming against a strong current—the harder we fight, the more exhausted we become.

But radical acceptance isn’t about giving up or pretending everything is fine. It’s about recognizing what’s really happening without judgment and without trying to change it. It’s saying, “This is what’s happening right now,” and letting go of the mental struggle that comes with wishing things were different.

In therapy, I help clients explore where they might be resisting reality and how that resistance is affecting their lives. We practice accepting what is, even when it’s uncomfortable. This doesn’t mean we stop caring or striving for change. It means we save our energy to make better choices and respond to life’s challenges more effectively.

Radical acceptance is a practice, something we might have to do again and again. And that’s okay. Each small step toward acceptance brings us closer to peace and a more grounded life. 

So, next time you find yourself resisting something in your life, try taking a deep breath and ask yourself, “What if I accepted this moment exactly as it is?” You might be surprised at the relief that follows.